


Tablet Seven

by LiteralistSin



Category: Fate/Grand Order, Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms, Fate/stay night - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, IM CRYING RN, Other, credit to me fren for the title, gilgamesh is just trying to live, haha - Freeform, haha tablet seven, i wrote this in an hour or so and then cried for seven weeks, im so sorry enkidu, just babylonia tingz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-10-17 01:23:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20612615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiteralistSin/pseuds/LiteralistSin
Summary: “It’s alright, Gil, we will meet again.” A smile of gratitude and acceptance.What happened to forever?





	Tablet Seven

Part of him is entirely numb to the once beautiful, once alive and smiling person - nay,  _ doll _ \- in his arms gradually turning to dust. Or what seems gradual, anyway, for the time that they seem to take cracking and breaking down feels no less than an eternity to him. The other part of him is still screaming, his head throbbing and his vision red. It feels like an eternity of pain and of broken sobs and a constricted throat while everything  _ burns _ and he wants himself to stop burning but wishes the world would burn alongside him simultaneously. 

“...you can’t do this to me.” He murmurs, holding his best friend - his only friend - closer. There is a surprised bark of laughter, or it would be a bark if there was any energy behind it, but it just sounds… soft. Weak. Neither of those were words he would have used to describe anything relating to Enkidu previously. 

“I am not.” Comes the reply, the voice behind the words so small it might as well not be there. He would have missed it if their mouth wasn’t literally next to his ear. If he wasn’t there for them right now. It could have passed over the wind in a place he couldn't have heard them and their last few words would have been gone just like that.

The sheer thought of that scares him. What if the circumstances were ever so slightly different and all of this happened where he couldn't see them? What if they just disappeared without anyone being there?

"Please... Please..." He chokes out, how undignified of him, kneeling on the floor and begging the one he should have been able to protect in the first place.

_ What if he hadn't been here - _ well, what had he done by being here anyway?

“Gil, shh… No, listen to me.” The frail voice by him speaks again, bringing a hand up by his cheek, using the last of their remaining life to stroke his skin with dying fingers. He can hear his heart crack and combust and fall down his ribcage and settle down somewhere in the pit of his stomach as he realises there is only an ash like sensation on his skin where Enkidu’s fingers meet. He looks down and peers through trembling eyelashes, finally looking at the body of the one in his arms. There are cracks on the arm that is raised to meet his cheek, and no clear outline. Enkidu may as well be a piece of broken pottery right now, cracked and crumbling with the original shape barely distinguishable. “Listen to me.” Their voice is firm now, soft and weak it may still be, but he can sense the conviction behind their words. 

“I - Yes, I’m here. I’m listening. Stay.” He rasps out, unable to say more than a word at a time, biting his lower lip  _ hard _ to make it stop trembling. 

“You will be fine. I cannot stay, and you know that.”

“No -  _ no,  _ I forbid it, you simply - you simply cannot just leave me like this! I am the king, I am  _ the  _ goddamn  _ King _ of goddamn Uruk and you cannot go against my orders!” He clutches them closer to his heart, burying his own face in their hair - the soft texture familiar to his skin, the act so natural that his bones knew of it. Only yesterday they lay thus in each other’s embrace. “I want you to stay, you  _ will _ stay, you are not allowed to go against me!” His voice is getting increasingly feverish and loud, in the back of his mind he recognises himself as a child throwing a tantrum over a toy snatched away by his parents.

Except he wasn’t a child anymore. And Enkidu was no toy of his. Not his. Maybe of the gods.

His best friend lets out a breathy chuckle, and he feels anger bubbling up in the pit his heart fell down to. “How can you laugh - ” He roughly breaks back ever so slightly from their embrace to look at them, mad at them for laughing, mad at the world for all of this, mad at himself for who knows what reasons. And he freezes, because now he is looking at their face, their beautiful face appearing even paler than usual and their cheek already turned to grey dust like the stuffing in a sack that was falling out. 

“Ah, good, you finally looked at me.” They smile as another crack causes the left half of their face to break away completely, and he takes a shuddering breath as he feels his muscles rip inside of him at the sight. The one good eye that is looking at him is full of unshed tears - but somehow, they don’t look sad. 

It is the same smile they had given him when they lay on the ground after their first battle, both thoroughly spent but in high spirits at having found an equal. A rival. A friend. 

“It’s alright, Gil, we will meet again.” A smile of gratitude and acceptance.

What happened to forever?

"So forget me until then."

What the  _ fuck _ happened to forever being with each other?

“Don’t  _ leave me. _ You know I can't. Never.” He all but begs, uncaring of what expression he’s making right then. There is the taste of metal in his mouth and he is vaguely aware that he has been biting his lip too hard, and Enkidu’s face is a bit blurry through his own tears and he just can’t stop shaking - but Enkidu doesn’t look half as angry and devastated as he probably does right now. He hates that.  _ Why aren’t you mad, _ he thinks,  _ why don’t you scream? _

“I am not leaving you.” Enkidu says, the hand that was cupping his cheek already gone, disappeared into specks of dust and returned to the earth. They closed their eye, and he could barely make out a tear trickling down their cheek. “I am just going on ahead. I am… truly grateful we met.”

“How  _ can  _ you-”

“With you by my side I felt human.”

“-no, no you can’t, stop, please-”

“I had a heart! I was glad. I was so glad.”

“-I said STOP, SHUT UP, YOU’RE GOING NOWHERE-”

“It was fun…” He couldn’t make out what they were saying anymore, he couldn’t see them, and there was no weight in his arms anymore. “We’ll meet again.”

“ _ ENKIDU _ , I beg of you, I cannot, I cannot-”

“I will wait for you...”

“-I cannot live without you anymore.”

They say something else, chapped lips forming words he cannot hear over his own agonised screams and he is left clutching cloth and the memories of the only one who ever stood by his side.

_ \- But I love you, _ his throat constricts with unspoken words even as painful screams escape through his bleeding lips.

* * *

  
  


When, years later, he sees the one in Enkidu’s skin - the one who is not Enkidu - he manages to fetch a barely registered sentence from the crevices of his memory. A memory of the one with the same voice. A memory of the worst experience in his life.

_ “...Sometime in the future. So don’t be sad.” _

So that is why they had smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> ahahaha..a hahaha.. . [doubles up in pain]


End file.
